Not Gonna Look Back

Before I enrolled into college, many of my older friends who are or have been to college tell me that when in college I would definitely miss high school. They would tell me how stressful and tiring it is to be in college. At that time, I had almost no idea what college life would be like so I thought that maybe college is scary.

On 24th March 2008, I started my very first day at college. I remember the few days before I was pretty anxious and nervous. Some people seemed to have given me the impression that girls studying mass communication are known to be er...vicious. But hey, even before the first week ended, I landed myself in a circle of friends whom we have come to be quite close till now. So then I thought, maybe college isn't that bad.

However, there was another thing. During my primary and high school life, most of the years I would say I was close to being "shunted aside." It was quite rare that people would cast a third glance at me, (there would be a second glance because I was quite chubby back then.) It wasn't until the last few years at high school when I lost some weight and my confidence level shot up quite a bit. Still, it is hard to suddenly change overnight when the last decade or so you've been strongly associated with the adjectives "quiet", "shy" and "timid."

Due to that, I was really looking forward to college as a chance for me to start over afresh. I was much more confident in myself with the extra weight gone and pretty good SPM results in my name. Also, I was gonna meet a whole bunch of people who have no idea of who I am in the past. The very thought of that gave me a feeling that consists of a mixture of confidence, excitement and readiness to prove myself to everyone. Hence, that gave me all the assurance I needed to apply for a full scholarship offered by Taylor's. That bit of confidence and assurance gave me the will to really put effort into the essay and presentation and interview. And hey, I did get the full scholarship. Previously though, if we were to go back many years in time, I wouldn't have possessed the courage to do so. Not to even try. Yeah, I was that pathetic.

Besides that, in college I have the opportunity to spread out and be active. In fact, right now I'm in 6 clubs and associations at college. Although only 2 of the clubs have been busy lately, the rest are pretty much quiet. But even then, I have had my hands full for the past few weeks with club activities and workshops. I love being involved in things. Some people feel that it is such a bother and hassle to join clubs. To me, it is the opposite. I never had the chance during high school, so I am taking the chance now at college.

Some of my now college friends tell me that they miss high school. Maybe it was because they had something to look back at during high school. But not for me.