Heart-Shaped Box by Joe Hill

Ah, finally another good book. I picked this book up when I went to the previous Big Bad Wolf Warehouse Sales. Books were really cheap there, averaging RM8 though of course you won't find popular international best-sellers there. Most of them were pretty much unknown here, which made it even better for me. =D

Anyway, I went to the sales alone as I couldn't find anyone to go with me. So I took my time and lugged 7 books back home.

Out of the 7 books, this book cover caught my eye the most. I guess you could say I do actually judge a book first by its cover. When I first saw this book, I instantly thought how the title sounds completely different from the cover illustrations and synopsis at the back. I discovered it was actually a horror book and I've always been a fan of horror but have yet to find any good, original ones. And something told me this one was gonna be good.

And yep I was right. Although it did take me a few weeks to finish it 'coz in between finishing I finished another book as well, "Acting It Up" by Melissa Nathan, a typical, predictable chic-lit (which I managed to finish during the weekend.) I guess the reason why I finished the chic-lit first was because I've always felt that they were easier to read. There's not so much to process, storyline is almost predictable. In other words, I guess you could say I was lazy to get some serious reading done.

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"Heart-Shaped Box" wasn't at all like how I predicted. The title alone is misleading, at first glance I thought it was another romance story. But it was more than that. (Note: It's actually a title of a Nirvana song). It tells a story of how middle-aged rock star Judas Coyne hears of someone selling a ghost on the Internet. Being a collector of various dark and macabre artefacts, Judas fell for the bait.

The ghost arrived in a black heart-shaped box and inside it was a suit that once belonged to the ghost. At its arrival, the house became cold, the dogs started barking and made Judas wonder if he was beginning to hallucinate things.

But it doesn't stop there. The ghost was "sent" to Judas for a reason. A reason so fearful that it made him run for his life.

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Joe Hill has done an excellent job keeping the atmosphere of this book with deep resonances of the dark and macabre. I find that this book maintains a good balance of reality and fantasy. Despite the mentioning of many occult and gothic elements, the true and masked horror contained here is the vicious cycle of human abuse. How victims of abuse can grow up to become an abuser themselves.

There is actually a bit of romance in this story , that is if you could actually call it romance. Judas has got a live-in girlfriend who was also dragged into his ghostly endeavours. At the beginning of the book, you could see that it was a love-hate thing. Of course, Judas being a rock star with an abusive background would have all emotions and sentimentality robbed of him. So, don't expect lots of "I love you"s. But there's something about Judas's character that's so well written that you will find him so likeable. Even his girlfriend's character will surprise you in the end.

All in all, I think that this book is worth wayyy much more than the price I paid. Nowadays, with so many books repeating the same themes especially chic-lits (sorry I just can't get my head around them =P) it's hard to find really good books that stands out. Sure, I do read Sophie Kinsella's Shopaholic series (in fact, it's the only chic-lit I like) but that's more for entertainment. To find something that can be appreciated as good literature is like finding a needle in a haystack.

Well at least to me. =D

P.S. I know I'm probably slower than others, but Green Day's latest album 21st Century Breakdown is awesome!

To put it blatantly, I'm terrified

I realized that it is the easiest for me to blog when I'm left completely alone in the room. Like now for instance. I suppose the quietness allows my thoughts to resonate purposefully without being diverted or distracted.

You know my parents have always been pretty hard on pushing us to strive to be the best but at the same time they will also remind us that they will always be someone out there better than us. Hmm...discouraging and contradicting, much? But anyhow, I don't see why we still should not try and perform our very best.

So yeah, in high school, I was pretty much among the top 10s or so especially in English, which my Dad is really particularly proud of. Sometimes he does it so often that I feel embarassed about it. Lol. But no that's not the bad thing.

The bad thing is, when I came to college, it didn't take me long to find myself struggling to be one of the best. And I don't think I've achieved it. Yet. I hope.

It just demoralizes me each time when I find out I'm lagging quite some way behind the better ones. And not too mention I feel like the dumbest among the other TWC Scholarship recipients. At times, I feel the pressure of the expectations placed upon me by so many people - lecturers, friends, parents and also the advertising company that is supposed to provide me with my very first job upon graduation. Every semester, they'll be updated with my progress in both academic and co-curricular terms. That itself is a very terrifying thought. =/

Honestly, I do feel that the subjects I have now is wayyy different and possibly harder than say subjects of maths and sciences. Why do I say this? Simply because most of the solutions in maths and science subjects are already pre-determined. It is pure objective facts and answers. 2+2 will always equals to 4 no matter who is the person answering it. Whereas in the subjects I do, most of the time the answers are very subjective. Scoring high marks will depend on how well you present your points and way of seeing things. Having perfect grammar and good command of English will only help to a certain extent. The rest is different. It depends on how good a communicator you are.

And that is where I think I'm lacking in. I was based on a maths and science background. I tend to see things one-way. My mind is very, very logically structured. But at the same time, I detest the maths and sciences. I believe I am flawed in that sense where I am not able see and write things on a more open end. However, I do think that since I am aware of my flaws there is a chance for me to improve on it though a lot of hard work and effort will be required.

The thing is, am I ready for it? Am I ready to spend hours reading and analysing proper references? Do I have the determination to do so?

Hmm I think I have spent more time than I should on enjoyment. I have been far too laid-back. Foundation year was a breeze and clearly degree is not the same. Time to step my game up. I already have the proper language tools, so might as well make the most of it. =)

You know, today is one of my "thinking" days. What are "thinking" days, you wonder? Well it's one of those days where my mind actually twitches enough to get me thinking. Thinking of what, you ask? Hmm, I suppose it's mostly things I would love to write and blog about but I can't. Why not? Because it may be a bit too opinionated and some people reading it may not necessarily see eye-to-eye with me. Hence, it becomes a no-go and I'll be compelled to discard that thought. =/

And that leaves me with a desolated blog. I don't know why but I don't really fancy posting up my everyday life with lots of pictures to accompany it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against people who do it. In fact, I find it entertaining to read about other people's daily activities. It's just that I don't really feel thrilled to post up mine.

If you've noticed, you would see that my blog is mainly made up of words? There are very few pictures. Again, it's just something about me. I love seeing lots of words on a page. I suppose it makes me feel clever about myself =P. Lol.

Mmm...3:16am. I should really try to go to sleep. My new semester will be starting next week and my classes begins at 8:00am. Need to get used to waking up early again. But the thing is, I have been having problems falling asleep. I'd go to bed and lay there for more than an hour whilst the person next to me snores occasionally. And this happened pretty much every night for the past month. The other day I kinda felt this feeling of dread washed over me when the thought of sleep came into mind. Internally (and silently), I freaked out. I never thought I would feel afraid to go to bed.

There's something wrong with me isn't it? =/ *sigh*

Goodnight guys. Let's give going to sleep another try.