Dissapointment

Ah, disappointment. What's not to like about it? It happens to the best of us and some might say disappointment is worst than conflict. I think so too.

I'm no stranger to disappointment, especially towards myself. I tend to hold extremely high expectations of myself and when I end up short, I become all bitter and angry with myself. But you know what's worse? Feeling disappointed of others.

Why do I say so? Because when you're disappointed of yourself, at least you're able to evaluate yourself and work out a plan to avoid it in the future. But if you're disappointed over someone else, then you don't have control of the situation.

I was never good when it came to handling disappointment, even if it was over myself. I think it's cause I tend to always want to give others the benefit of the doubt that when they disappoint, I feel horrible. I feel terrible on their behalf. Not angry, but disappointed.

And it doesn't end there. After that I'll pray and wish with all my might that they'll come around and address the issue. But usually it doesn't happen. Like I said, I'm too nice. I can't help but hope that with time the best of people will emerge.

It's a sucky feeling, being disappointed. And not angry-disappointed but hopeful-disappointed. As in you're disappointed but still hopeful that things will get better.

Maybe it will?

Oh, there I go again.

Good morning, ignoramus

Ten months. It's been ten months since the last update. And let me say it's been one hell of a roller coaster ride.

Reading back my previous posts, something comes to mind.

Juvenile. So, so juvenile.

Had I been so young? So narcissistic?

So...unknowing.

Ignorant would be too strong a word to use but something along the lines of it.

And when I browsed back to posts back in 2007/2008, I was shocked.

Looking at how I write, think and feel then makes me feel like a kid now.

Had I lost that raw curiosity? That intense passion?

How can the then 16-year-old me sound more mature than the now 20-year-old me?

Is it possible to have grown in reverse?

Now when I think again, ignorant fits the picture.

Have a good day.

So....hi

Mmm...hi.

I've been ignoring this blog for such a long time that I have no idea what to post anymore. For some reason I always experience a feeling of dread when I think about updating this blog. Maybe I'm just bored. I tend to get bored of things fast (no, not people). Or maybe I'm just plain lazy and uninspired.

I think it is the latter. Or a possible mixture of both. I dunno.

Anyway, it is the Chinese New Year now. It's been the usual humdrum each year. Though there are slight variations each year. Mostly I began noticing the people. Not that I've never noticed them, but it's more like I began studying them closer. It's actually pretty interesting. You'd be marveled by what you discover.

Another thing is, I've also been on a semester break since the end of November last year. For one and a half months I was interning at Ogilvy PR and after that I spent the rest of the holidays back home. It was during then I also discovered something else. It's not really a bad thing but just something I noticed.

I found that as I grow older I began noticing how disparate my principals and opinions are from my parents. It's strange. You'd think having a Dad who has been passing on his wisdom and values to me constantly since I was 7 years old would have made me like him. But I would say the similarities are not great. Perhaps it's because of what I've been exposed to. A lot of Western culture and ideologies I would say. And I don't mean the MTV, promiscuity and drugs. More like how I think and judge myself and my surroundings.

I find myself very individualistic, unlike Asians in general, who are more inclined to collectivity. It's not a bad thing. Just a difference. Ah, well. Anyway, I've lost my train of thoughts. I'll leave it till the next update. I'm going to watch my favourite superhero. (Hint: He's yellow and porous =P).

2009: The Year of Awesome Movies

I think it's safe for me to say that 2009 passed by like no other year has passed me by. To be honest, the past whole year appears as a blur to me. I have trouble distinguishing what happened in 2009 and 2008. I keep mixing them up. So, if you notice that some of the movies listed here are actually released in 2008, kindly bare with me. To me it feels like I've just watched it this year, oops I mean last year.

Note: The list isn't arranged according to superiority or whatever I think is better. So, the numbers mean nothing, unless I specify it myself.

1. Star Trek (2009)

Okay, I must say this: Star Trek blew me away. Yes it did. I'm not a Star Trek fan but oh my god. This movie is a must, must, MUST watch for those who haven't. Even if you're not a sci-fi fan, do me a favour and give this movie a chance. I thought Zachary Quinto and Eric Bana gave stellar performances. Chris Pine did pretty good himself too. The effects were excellent and the plot is solid. So what more can you ask for from such an awesome movie? List it down as one of your new year's resolutions ;).

2. The Dark Knight (2008)

Of all superhero movies (Spiderman, Superman, Incredible Hulk, etc.), Batman is my favourite. Why? Because he's human. He didn't get exposed to meteor rocks, radiation or bitten by some mutant creature. I like that he got his strength not through supernatural ways. Anyway, The Dark Knight is in my opinion the best Batman movie.

When I was watching it in the cinema I actually lost track of time and became so absorbed into the movie. I was practically holding my breath throughout the movie because when the credits rolled in I let out this huge whoosh of air. In plain words, The Dark Knight just blew me away. Definitely gave me one of the best experiences I had of watching movies in the cinema. Christian Bale is one of my favourite actors and he lived up to my expectations of Bruce Wayne's character and possibly surpassed it. Also, without a doubt the late Heath Ledger gave a spectacular performance as The Joker, almost eerily so.

3. District 9 (2009)

For those who have watched District 9 I think you will agree with me that it is definitely one of 2009's best movies. Prior to watching this I actually had no idea what it is about, apart from hearing some trailer snippets on the radio. So I went in with an open mind and I'm glad I did.

This movie stands more than a mile apart from other movies of its genre. The story is a unique and refreshing change from the stereotypical alien movies we've had. The thing that made me go 'wow' was how seamlessly it went from being a documentary-drama to a Hollywood style movie. It being sorta like a documentary movie gave the viewers a feeling like it was actually real and happening. The movie's atmosphere is dark, bleak and unnerving. To be honest, I felt quite disturbed when the movie ended, which means the movie has done its job. Also, top notch performances by the actors. Excellent movie.

4. Gamer (2009)

Okay, so I know the title Gamer may sound a little corny but bare with it and go watch it. I'll be honest, Gamer is not for everyone. Again this is one movie I have no knowledge prior to watching it, only having read a few reviews about it being different. And it did prove so. For many it will take maybe a good 20 to 30 minutes into the movie before you actually understand what it is about. I love the concept and idea the directors had in mind. The movie atmosphere has this sort of dark and unrealistic tinge to it. Strange yet unnervingly possible to become reality.

I thought both antagonist and protagonist were casted excellently. It's face-paced, action-filled and very thought-provoking. It pushes your mind and makes you think, unlike many Hollywood movies which only inflate your mind with air. So give this movie a chance because I think there is more substance to it than its corny name.

5. The Time Traveler's Wife (2009)

I think you may have noticed they aren't many love flicks and romantic comedies listed here. Haha it's not that I don't watch them, it's just that the movie industry is sooo saturated with romantic comedies and dramas. Everywhere you turn you see a movie poster of an upcoming love story. It gets really predictable and boring after a while. No doubt there are a few which stands out. And one of them is The Time Traveler's Wife.

After The Notebook, this is one of the saddest movies I have watched. It may be a bit lengthy and slow but I guess that plays a part in making it so heart-wrenching. I swear my heart was actually twisting in pain while watching this. Incredibly romantic and sweet. This is a true blue, classic love story. Girls, this will definitely go down well with you guys. As for the boys, it doesn't mean you're less manly by watching this. =)

6. Coraline (2009)

I'm a huge fan of cartoons and animated movies. I don't believe that you'll ever be too old for cartoons. I'm disgusted by people who say cartoons are for babies. Sometimes it is cartoons and animated movies that remind me how a movie really should be.

So for this list I have picked Coraline. Trust me, it is not a movie to bring little kids along to watch. Even for me I found it a little creepy. But that's also what I love about it. Other than it being a stop-motion film. I think it has important values to offer and confers a subliminal message that the viewers can each relate to.

7. Avatar (2009)

I think many of you were hoping to see Avatar on the list. Well here it is. But I'm going to say I did not enjoy the story. I felt it was so cliche and predictable. The embedded love story was so corny and I was thinking to myself while watching, 'Omg, such a great movie with awesome visuals but it has to have such a corny love story.'

What I love about Avatar is its amazing visuals and imaginativeness. I'm totally into fantasy movies and I absolutely love the entire world of Pandora. My favourite is how the forest ground and plants light up during the night. Almost fairytale-like.

So to sum it up, I love the visuals and effects but not the story. A part of me actually wishes that it was entirely about the Na'avi people with no humans involved. That would really make my whole fantasy movie thing.

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That's the end of the list. The reason why it stops at 7 and not 10 or 15 or something is because I feel if I were to set a number like say, 10, then I'd have think up an additional 3 when I only liked 7. So in a way the additional 3 movies would have been something that I liked less but I have to pretend that I like it more just so to make my numbers up to 10. Get it?

Anyhow I hope you enjoyed the list and if you any different opinions don't be shy, we can discuss about it. =)

Happy New Year!